Jeremiah - God is Our Home

          The days have been getting more and more exciting as we draw closer to the birth of our first child! The anticipation is killing and I'm just constantly checking up on Allison to see if she is having contractions or feeling strange or different. I am going to be a father soon! As I think about all that it means to be a parent and have the responsibility of caring for another growing, living, human being I get a little worried that I won't be good enough.

          We have prepared every square inch of our apartment for the arrival of this baby. I have started thinking about what things I need to maybe take out of my day to day routine like what kind of movies I watch our video games I play and how much I use that kind of entertainment to fill my time. I don't my child to be glued to the TV or phone screen. I am thinking about how I can build new life giving habits like conditioning my body for stamina and strength. In fact just before summer came this last year my back went out, and I was stuck in bed for about a week. I don't want that to happen again especially as the baby comes. I am also planning for the weeks after we come back to the U.S. in July. Also, the years after, and what our ministry will look like in combination with our job choices. This can be really stressful as I realize that their is just a lot to think about. With all these thoughts it's easy for me to get overwhelmed and wonder if I can be the father, the parent I want to be. However, I have been developing another great practice. This practice is simply being still before God.

         The last thing I want to do when I feel overwhelmed is be still. Logically, if there are many things to accomplish and to be done then it makes sense to start making moves to progress towards these goals. But I am experiencing just how God is building me up and strengthening me in these moments when my body and my mind are simply still. My mind needs a lot of healing. It is so easy to get discouraged and distracted by my own thoughts or concerns. So I have been taking about 15 minutes a day to sit down and do what is referred to as "centering prayer". I have a word that center my thoughts around and this word is something that reminds me who God is. In the beginning of our time here in Norway my word was "trust". So I would find a quiet place and sit and close my eyes and let my mind go wherever it wanted. However, every 30 seconds or so I would remember my centering word, trust and it would center me back to just being still before God. My centering word has changed through out the last year. For a while it was, love. After that it was, life. Really, no matter what it has been it has just been a reminder that God is good and is with me as I practice moving away from using Netflix or Video Games or Facebook to pacify my anxiety or stress. Recently the word, home has been my centering word. And this word reminds me that God is my home where ever I live or my family lives, and no matter where my friends are or my community is. This provides me with so much freedom to confident in moving forward in the midst of feeling overwhelmed sometimes. Not only am I finding my safety in God being my home but I know that God my child's home. Even though I can't quite see the future house we will live in I know that God is going to be with me, with Allison, with our son or daughter, with us every step of the way. God is our safety. God is Our Home